I had a conversation with my sister recently about all the things that surprised her when she moved from America to Greece. It’s pretty interesting, watching her absorb all the same minor cultural shocks I experienced when I left for Greece a few years prior.

Let’s say you want to settle down with a nice Greek guy – which my sister has been considering. Chances are, if he’s under 35, he probably still lives with his mother.

It’s very common in Greece for young adults to remain “in the nest” long after they’ve turned 18, because family life is so deeply rooted in Greek society. Multi-generational housing continues to be a typical living arrangement, with little to no pressure of moving out before marriage. If anything, married couples often stay in their parent’s or grandparent’s home, living just one floor above or below, to remain close and look after the older generations.

American culture is so rife with symbols of independence that we take them for granted, but Greece is a far more collectivist society at its core. Obtaining a driver’s license is a perfect example of this – in the United States, it’s seen as a mandatory rite-of-passage for teenagers nearing adulthood. In Greece, it’s considered to be something entirely optional. Many prefer to operate motorbikes and scooters, viewing cars as a luxury or an impracticality given the narrowness of the roads in rural areas. In general, widespread financial constraints make things like forgoing car ownership and multi-generational housing a normal part of life in Greece.

Another funny little thing I picked up on immediately – at least, from a Greek American’s point of view – is the plain language Greeks use to communicate on a daily basis. The last thing a local Greek expects to hear is a longer sentence that means the same thing. For example, when you’re out to eat and it’s time to pay, you don’t ask the waiter, “Can I please have the bill?” You simply say, “Can I pay?”

The same principle applies to almost any routine interaction one might observe on a regular basis. For example, if you need help locating an item at the supermarket, you don’t ask the employee, “Excuse me?” and pause, waiting for them to read your mind or pipe up with a “How can I help you?” like you’d hear in America. If anything, they’d counter with “What do you want?” and it doesn’t mean they’re exasperated or being rude.

Bluntness is commonly employed in Greece day-to-day. If you have a question about the location of a product, cut to the chase and say, “Can I ask you a question? Where is the _______?”

When I first moved to Greece around eight years ago – using those initial few months to learn simple words and sentences to get by – commonplace bluntness shocked me and left me thinking everyone defaulted to rudeness in everyday speech. Now I realize that’s just the way it’s done in Greece. Instead of complaining, it’s best to adapt and learn from those around you in order to fit in.

I’d be remiss if I didn’t mention food habits in Greece vs. those touted as authentic among Greek Americans. At local restaurants, my Greek American family will always ask for lamb, much to my personal embarrassment. In reality, many Greeks don’t like the taste of lamb. And, even if they do, it is only eaten during Easter celebrations. To flip the script for emphasis, this would be like Greeks assuming Americans eat Thanksgiving turkey once a week.

In my experience, the same goes for Magiritsa – known by many Diaspora Greeks as “Easter soup” – and Avgolemono. Near as I can tell, both are very unpopular among today’s Greeks. Since leaving America, I have befriended over 100 locals around my age. Quite literally 0% enjoy Magiritsa and Avgolemono.

Believe me, I love these two dishes dearly and grew up with them, but I’ve come to regard them as yet another village tradition Greek Americans left Greece with in the 50’s, 60’s and 70’s, and keep alive in their Diasporic habits. Just like my sister had to learn and I myself before her, our vision of the fatherland in America and its actual state in Greece can be two different worlds.